Here I An Still

So, tonight after work I turned off the TV, set a time, and dedicated an hour to reading.  I finished up a poetry book by Mary Oliver (who I always get confused with Jane Olivor) and then read a couple of pages in Josemaria Escriva's book "The Way".  For those who aren't familiar with him he was the founder of the Catholic Order of Opus Dei.  Both reads really helped me find the still point of the night. 

Today was a "come to Jesus" meeting at work, which was part of my stress load.  In our last block release I had two projects that I delayed because they were not ready for release. In my imagination I conjured a lot of sturm und drang for the meeting.  In fact though, it went very smoothly. I explained why I delayed the projects, the reasons for the delay, and the response from leadership was "okay, that makes sense".  I've got a good imagination and sometimes it gets away from me imagining negative scenarios. It is a trait I am aware of and that I try to counter with limited measures of success.

So, now that we are through the block release we just have to close on these two projects and then we can pivot over to the July block release.  I am sitting much better for the July block as the lead time is wider.  The last release had a very tight lead time - we know better, but periodically we can't avoid it and we suffer because of it.  Hopefully, there will be less suffering in this next block release.  Though, if you go back through this blog and read entries from years ago you'll find very similar entries.  It is a function of being a project management that you're always locked in battle with the inherent conflicts between resources and schedule.

Other than that, it was a nice day.  We've got a bit of rain coming in, but the afternoon was very pleasant, the bird tribe was very entertaining, and the day had it's bright spots.  Tonight is the latest episode of "The Expanse" so I am looking forward to watching it on DVR tomorrow.  I will probably save it for tomorrow night and then do my usual routine, which is to order pizza and enjoy the show.  Also, exciting of exciting - Archer comes back!  In you are not an Archer fan, or if you've never seen the show before, it comes with a high recommendation from me

On that note, I am going to wrap it up and call it a night.

A Spot of Tea

Chaos Tea would be a good name for a band.

It is a little after 7 o'clock in the evening here in California. The workday was as chaotic as I expected. I had a solid block of meetings from 8:00 AM until 1:30 PM. That is always brutal on a Monday because everyone tries to hit the deck running and email are flying all over.

I made it through the day and tomorrow's calendar is fairly clear, so I've blocked out some time for what I called Project 125. It's the number of backlogged email I want to try and get through.

I wrapped work around 5:00 PM then popped out for a bite to eat at a local dinner. It was tasty and quite which is exactly what I was looking for. After dinner I circled back home, restocked my tea box, and made myself a nice cup of Harrowgate of London Orange & Lemon tea to savor as the sun sets on a beautiful evening.

My mind is kind of exhausted from all the mental gymnastics of the day so my energy is running a bit low. Savoring a cup of tea has restorative powers, even more so when it's coupled with the poetry of Mary Oliver (which I always get confused with the music of Jane Olivor).

So, with a cup of good tea and a good book of poetry I wish you, dear reader, all of the good things in life - and tomorrow is another day!

Video Games Killed My Friends

I actually had the Ruggles song running through my brain (Video Killed The Radio Star) and I thought it would be an appropriate title for this entry.  I mentioned in an early entry that I had a bit of insight over the weekend.  It was a sudden flash of insight based on a very short conversation. 

I'd driven across town and picked up one of my friends for breakfast.  My friend noticed that I was distracted and asked why.  I told them that I was very contemplative and that my mind was whirring around certain things - one of them was the quote from Mary Oliver:

"Tell me, what is it you plan to do/with your one wild and precious life."

My friend responded instantly and defensively.  "When someone asks me that question I respond "I'm living it, what are you doing?"  The vehemance of the response caught me off guard. (I wasn't asking the question of my friend, but rather I was commenting on how it was the question that I was asking myself.)  I let it slide by and went on to enjoy breakfast, but I kept thinking about it.

There was a time when most of my friends were actively engaged in life.  They routinely "went places, met people and did things".  But, and I partly blame aging, over the last couple of years that level of engagement has fallen away.  For some of it, I actually blame video games. Now, this isn't an anti-video game screed by any means.  I play the occasional video game and I enjoy them. (I am currently playing Skyrim when I am in the mood.)  I play far fewer hours than my friends - perhaps two to four hours a week, if that.

Most of my friend play, conservatively, in excess of 12 hours a week, some of them a lot more.  In essence, they play an entire day or two of video games. My hat has always been off to the inventors of video games - if you think about it from a pyschological standpoint, through the use of flashing lights and moving figures and imaginary micro-rewards and accomplishments, they've managed to convince millions of people to spend millions and millions of hours to sit in front of a computer screen and press buttons.  Not only that, but they have convinced people to pay them for the privilege.  Wow.  (Hahahaha - pun intended.)

Somehow, I don't think that when we get to the end of our one wild and precious life, we're going to lament that we won't be able to play anymore video games.  Or watch any more T.V..  Maybe it's just me.  Maybe it is just a reflection of who I am and where I am going in my life but, there are plenty of other things I would rather be doing with my one wild and precious life.  In the end, it's all a judgement call.

Sharing: The Summer Day - Mary Oliver

Who made the world?
Who made the swan, and the black bear?
Who made the grasshopper?
This grasshopper, I mean-
the one who has flung herself out of the grass,
the one who is eating sugar out of my hand,
who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down-
who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.
Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.
Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.
I don't know exactly what a prayer is.
I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down
into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,
how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,
which is what I have been doing all day.
Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?