Thursday, June 6, 2013
Today is one of those days that has, so far, been quietly overwhelming. My mother has landed back in the hospital as they are attempting to get a better balance on her pain medications and hopefully, help in the transition into an assisted living environment. So, this morning, I called and spoke with my sister for a while, and we went over the details, options, feelings, philosophies and emotions. One of the challenges that I find with my family is there seems to be solid opposition to discussing things rationally before they happen. Consequently, I often find myself having to go through the associated emotional ride, again, that I had already been on. Combine that with my natural urge to cut to the chase on most things and those extended conversations can be a vexation.
At work today the day is small intervals between a solid line of meetings. This is one of those intervals. It will settle out a bit in the afternoon, but by that time I expect to be totally fried, mentally. Today is one of those days where what I am doing is simply trying to open my mind and let all the information flow into it. I figure that I will sort it all out later, once it is in place!
Fortunately, given the high meeting schedule I decided to work virtually today, so I am sitting in my home office, bathed in natural light, window open for fresh air, birds and street sounds outside, and just an overall, comfortable, modern environment. I do sometimes wonder how much of my struggles at work over the last couple of years is the result of working in a physical environment that is simply not good - old, dingy, poorly maintained, monochrome, and no sunlight. Maintaining a good mood in that environment is difficult at best. So, let just call the day quietly overwhelms, meditate a bit, and then slide back into the fray.